One of the hardest things in realizing I needed God in my life, was the betrayal of either one of my parents in picking a path to God. Now that I realize Jesus is the only path to God, I have not betrayed anyone. It comes down to who I am at the core. My character is to be loyal to my friends, family, job, and in some extended situations, places to eat, drink and hang out. It is hard for me to separate myself from situations, without pain in making the break.
When I counted the cost of moving to Colorado, it weighed on me about the Shaolin Hung Mei Pai back home and Shaolin Hung Mei in Colorado. Also, my job with my father to switching to another company in Colorado. When I left the cleaning company, it was for an opportunity to work where I could directly effect what I make immediately. That was something I missed from working for my father. That's how I ended up at Old Chicago. I am not one to just leave, because I don't like where I am, rather, it takes some form of extreme desire or event to want me to change.
For me, when it came to matters of the Cross, I had never been loyal to anything for my entire life. I mean, living a life worthy to be called a Disciple of Jesus, takes a commitment to a lifestyle, not a religion. The only thing that I can equate to Discipleship is my Kung Fu, but even that has no place in my life right now. This was the biggest thing I got hung up on when it came to getting baptized. I didn't want to disappoint, Jimmie, Steve and anyone else who studied the Bible with me. It took a conversation with Jim to come to decision that not getting baptized would disappoint God, and God alone.
The Cross signifies many things for a Disciple. We died to our sin, therefore we were dead to Jesus. He die for us, while we were still sinners, to demonstrate his love for us. (Romans 5:6-8) Jesus and God have been loyal to me, they have been there with the cleansing blood of the lamb, every time I fall short of staying absolutely righteous. It is this blood, cleansing me everyday when I sin in the eyes of my God.
